In April of 2016, a radio interview from NYC’s syndicated urban contemporary morning show, The Breakfast Club, featured a testy exchange that went from verbal to viral in a matter of minutes while adding a new phrase to the cultural lexicon in the process: “Put some respek (sp) on my name.”

Confused? Here’s the rundown: Cash Money Records’ co-founder, Bryan Christopher Williams, AKA Birdman, went on the air to allegedly discuss the fallout between himself and fellow and Cash Money artist, Lil Wayne. Instead of answering the host’s questions, however, Birdman was adversarial from the jump: “Stop playing with my [expletive] name, all three of you all…. When ya’ll saying my name, put some RESPEK on it.”

The response from news outlets, as well as social media was explosive: memes, audio remixes and yes, even a family-friendly a capella version of the two-and-a-half minute rant, courtesy of Anthony Hamilton’s background vocalists, the Hamiltones, also went viral. Birdman’s odd spelling of the word aside, the saying ‘put some respect on my name’ is now considered shorthand for, ‘don’t speak of me to others in a reckless fashion….or else.’ As widely as that phrase is now used, the topics of monikers resurfaced recently when a 1990 clip of the late Dr. Maya Angelou became viral for—wait for it—correcting a teenager who naively referred to the elder by her first name. The then-62-year-old was amiable, yet firm, in her response: “And first, I’m Ms. Angelou. I’m not Maya…..I’ve lived so long and tried so hard that a young woman like you, or any other, has no license to come up to me and call me by my first name.”

I found nothing wrong with the exchange: most of us in the Black community have been made aware of the flagrant disregard for age and status that many white people demonstrated for centuries by stripping the enslaved of their original names and then calling them such things as “boy,” “gal,” or by first names only, while they expected themselves and even their children, to be addressed by blacks as whatever title they pleased. Maybe Baby Girl was nervous, or maybe she wasn’t taught the etiquette lesson. But what wasn’t expected was the amount of younger people, the Millennial generation and younger, who rebuked Angelou and said they ought to ‘cancel’ Angelou’s lauded status for ‘being rude.’

Um….come again? Because Dr. Angelou asserted her wish to be spoken of like the elder she was, rather than the teen’s BFF, she was ‘rude’? Well then, I guess they would consider me rude as well. As a proud member of Generation X, I was certainly taught by my parents to not refer to elders by name unless it was their personal preference. Otherwise, you called them Auntie ____, Cousin _____ or Mr., Ms. and Mrs. Point-blank, end of discussion. Is it old school? Yes. Corny? To some. But Calvin and I have also taught our children to ‘put a handle on someone’s name’ if they are adults. According to the manners and etiquette book, The New Basic Black: Home Training For Modern Times, it’s just not proper form: “Do not, under any circumstances, believe that you have the right to address people by their first names when you have not been introduced to them as such…..It is best to err on the side of formality than be too familiar.”

Some see the title of demanding a reverence that isn’t owed, but really…..most adults don’t refer to professors or potential bosses as “Chuck” and “Denise,” so why not impart the lesson early in life? Behaving otherwise can imply ill manners or a lower opinion of the addressed, a perception that will garner less-than pleasant results. If it’s no longer ‘cool,’ so be it, but if I’m old enough to have birthed you, please call me ‘Auntie LoLo,’ Ms. Lorrie’ or ‘Mrs. Jackson.’ Period.

Put that respect on my name.

The Hamiltones – “Put Some Respeck On It”

While on the tour bus, The Hamiltones created a song based on Birdman’s recent quotables from his recent interview with The Breakfast Club.

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